Belmont Burlesque - The Naughty List

( Originally published on Blogger 12-10-2013 )

Carol of the Boobs

MsPixy, Lady Annabelle, Naughty Natanya, Bella Ciao, Hazel Hellbender, Diva LaVida, Slightly Spitfire & Pup T'Nogood

The people of Belmont Burlesque have provided me with good cause to find the answers to the following holiday entertainment questions.

- 1 -

What happens when you have two modest and self respecting Sugar Plum Fairies … Forced to deal with a little sister who can't seem to understand that “There are some things about us we really don't want the Human's to see”?

Sugar Plums

Naughty Natanya, Bella Ciao & Hazel Hellbender

- 2 -

Did the wayward Angel actually fall from grace? Or did she enjoy every single moment of casually strolling down the mountainside?

Bad Angel as performed by Bella Ciao

- 3 -

What happens when a good looking gentleman is politely trying to ask his Mis-Match.Com date to leave … And she's had just enough to drink, that no matter what the poor fellow says, she hears a sexual come on?

Baby It’s Cold Outside

Pup T'Nogood & Bambi Rein

- 4 -

What is it going to cost me to have Bazuka Joe perform at my Lovely Evil Wife's Birthday Party this Summer?

Drummer Boy as performed by Bazuka Joe

- 5 -

And most important of all …

How good of a review should a smart ass Irish Comedian expect when he's decided to make fun of the nation of Wales … Not realizing that the invited Drama Critic has a grandfather by the last name of Edwards?

Featured Comedian - Adam Burke

What I love most about the people of Belmont Burlesque, is that they combine a delightfully refined sense of the absurd with a healthy respect for propriety. While very little is sacred to this group of delightful lunatics, they clearly know how to avoid the crude and tasteless forms of behavior that a lot of modern day slobs and buffoons are determined to try and pass off as comedy. They work very hard to take the high road and their shows are made that much better for it.

Having not seen Adam Burke before this show, I'm rather happy that I got the opportunity to watch the boy perform before some other angry Welshman decided to strangle him with his bare hands. Burke has a comedy style that tends to be casual and meandering. Quite different from the frantic scattergun type of routine that is too often present in 21st Century Comedy Clubs. The man is as much a Storyteller as he is a Comedian. And that is very welcome to my ears.

I hope to have the opportunity to watch Adam perform again, in the not too distant future, in spite of the fact that he's a stuck up Irish know it all. Because I'm darn certain that the two of us would be quite happy to sit down for a drink and do everything we could to bad mouth the English and the Scots. And don't even get us started on the French.

I want to hand a special shout out to Ms Pixy, who makes the task of being an M.C. Appear almost effortless. Having done that job, I can attest to the fact that it can be nerve racking.

From beginning to end … This past Weekend's show was nothing less than solid. Often rising to masterful and hilarious. There was not a bad act in the bunch. And I'm very sorry I don't have the opportunity to mention every single act and performer by title and name.

The Cast performing White Christmas

If you were unlucky enough to miss that performance, feel free to visit the Wit Theater this coming Saturday. The troupe will be giving a (mostly) repeat performance with a few of this past Saturday's acts being replaced by other routines and artists.

That's the nature of Live Theatre. It's always changing and evolving.

Travis Clemmons.

Stripperfest: Aspen Reign

( Originally published on Blogger 11-14-2013 )

A good friend of mine is a professional makeup artist.

A few years ago, I saw him do a presentation where he brought twin sisters onto the stage and sat them about five feet away from each other. The girl on the left had been made up in a way that was appropriate for a photo shoot or the filming of a motion picture. The girl on the right had been prepared for appearing on stage in a theatre that would seat at least 500 people.

To the people near the front of the lecture hall, the girl on the left looked perfectly normal while the make up of the girl on the right appeared to be horribly over done.

To the people at the back of the room, the face of the girl on the left appeared to be little more than a vague blur while the girl on the right seemed incredibly attractive.

The moral of this little tale is that each young woman's makeup had been properly done. But each had been prepared for a different venue. While neither makeup job was Bad, each could easily be described as Right or Wrong ... Depending on the venue the girl was expected to perform in.

At StripperFest ... Both Aspen Reign and Artemis Moon delivered stunning performances. But it is my sincere opinion that Aspen gave a performance which was not a proper fit for the the nature of the Club or the Contest. Aspen presented what was primarily a Theatrical Performance, at a contest where the primary corner stone was dance.

Had Aspen been on stage in an auditorium which would seat at least 500 people ... Her large props, grand costumes and eye popping light show would have been a magnificent set of assets. That is the type of location where you want your routine to be larger than life.

But in a Club atmosphere ... Where the stage is modest in size and the people are so close that they can almost read the labels on the soles of your shoes ... This is where a performer needs to jettison the large props and elaborate costumes. This is where she needs to do everything she can to make the motion of her body the absolute center of everyone's attention. This is where she needs to give everyone in the front row a clear and compelling reason to believe that she knows they are there and that she adores each and everyone of them.

Aspen Reign gave a marvellous performance that weekend. But she did not give this performance.

The intimate and flirtatious performance was presented by Artemis Moon. And that is why she took the title "Queen Of The Stage".

In a different venue ... One where all the contestants were performing on a theatrical stage in front of a crowd of at least 500 people ... Aspen would quite likely have prevailed.

Travis Clemmons

Showbiz Interview: Serenna Starr

( Originally published on Blogger 11-14-2013 )

In the not too distant past, I satirically described Serenna Starr as the "Love Child of Jane Mansfield and a can of Minwax China Red. The people who know her well did not even think of trying to disagree with me.

        The Hair
                                          The Face
                                                  The Curves
                                                                                                      The Personality

All of these qualities are so delightfully distinctive ... The probably should be trademarked.

Travis:
How did you come up with the name "Serenna Starr"?

Serenna Starr:
Ha!

I'm a sucker for alliteration, and I wanted something that would put a smile on my face. So Serenna comes from the "serenity now!" Episode of Seinfeld.

Starr comes from the burlesque performer Blaze Starr (another fiery redhead) and Hedy Jo Starr (who happened to be a trans burlesque sensation, but more applicably was an incredible costumer).

Since I'm a fiery redhead, an awesome seamstress, and it all fit alliteratively ... I thought it fitting!

So basically no matter how the dj or emcee says my name when I'm announced for stage, I always hear George Costanza's dad yelling "serenity now!"

Travis:
(snicker)

Getting the "Girl Watcher" questions out of the way ...

How tall are you?

Serenna Starr:
5'6"of awesome

Travis:
And so darn modest about it (wink)

And what is the shoe size?

Serenna Starr:
9

Travis:
Eye Color?

Serenna Starr:
Greenish Hazely

Travis:
Is the hair usually kept that rich deep red with the burgundy tones? Or do you jump around a bit while still staying in the Red Zone?

Serenna Starr:
I jump around a bit.

I'll go from strawberry blonde to something richer based on season and whim. I went brunette earlier this year.

I don't know what I was thinking.

Travis:
So ... Red does seem to be your True Faith?

Serenna Starr:
I was born a strawberry head.

Travis:
My wife and I have the opinion that certain women look sexier on the "Slightly Robust" side of the equation. You fall into that category for us.

But how do you personally define when your body looks "Right"?

Serenna Starr:
I look fondly back to the days when I was a size 6 and mostly wish I was that size again (35 lbs ago). I like myself a lot though, and I don't have to be held to any standard other than just what makes me happy. I do think about being a touring feature again, but I know it would take a ridiculous amount of work.

Being that this can be such a short lived profession, I don't feel particularly motivated.For the most part, I get very positive responses about my look (I adore being compared to Christina Hendricks).

Travis:
You'll remember that I'd commented on how you could do a wicked interpretation of Saffron ... The character Christina had played on Firefly (wink).

Serenna Starr:
And you weren't the first person to tell me that (smile).

Travis:
Which evolved first in your life ... The performing or the costume creation?

Serenna Starr:
The costuming completely came first. I've been sewing the majority of my life.

I was a timid creature. I was doing some costuming for some girls at a local Club. A Featured Dancer came along and commissioned a few pieces from me. Paid me with rubber checks.

The check was large and I had written against it already, so I was basically double in the hole. So I started dancing to pay the bills.

Travis:
When you first began dancing for money ... How did you establish the nature of your routine?

Serenna Starr:
It kinda came about organically. Just enjoying the music and learning how to move. Later, I started developing shows. They were rough but they were enough to get me started traveling.

One day, things just kinda clicked, my feet started moving me in different ways, and voila! An actual dancer was born!

I will say that what made the biggest difference for me was exchanging my stripper platforms for regular 5" pumps.

Once I could feel the ground beneath my feet better, I was off and running!

Travis:
Did you ever manage to get any resolution on the Kangaroo Check?

Serenna Starr:
Yes.

I turned Ms. Bouncing Check and her agent (who was covering her tracks) into the States attorney. It took almost a year but I finally got paid

Travis:
Nice to hear.

Which would be the better Birthday Gift ... Wicked High Heels, Exotic Ear Rings or a Gift Certificate to a Fabric Shop?

Serenna Starr:
All of the above

Travis:
But if you had to make a choice?

Serenna Starr:
All of those things are equivalent to gifting me with porn.

I suppose, since I'm working on a new collection of sample gowns, the fabric store would be the better of the options.

Travis:
But the same question could get a different response in a few months?

Serenna Starr:
Yes.

It all depends on where my mind is at each moment.

Right now, the work and career side of my brain is engaged

Travis:
Being a costumer ... And having to work with the intricacies of the human body ... What do you find most challenging about designing for women?

Serenna Starr:
Getting the cut of a short just right.

Pants are harder anyway but every lady's posterior varies. So there isn't one perfect way to do it so it's the most flattering universally.

I've managed to succeed more often than not though!

Travis:
And men?

Serenna Starr:
I don't get to do a lot of design for fellas, but they are tons easier. Less curves and all of that.

Travis:
When we first met ... You were one of the Judges for Grand Prix of Exotic Dance.

How did this evolve?

Serenna Starr:
I used to get booked as a feature entertainer into On The Border. They used to book much more frequently than they do now.

Back then ... I was at that club around twice a year for three or four years in a row. The crew and I became friends and even after my retirement we still keep in touch. So they think of me when it comes to judging as their non-biased, non-involved in the industry, ex feature with a Keen and honest eye.

Travis:
At such a competition ... You're being called on to judge Stripper Style Stage Performing. How is that similar to a Burlesque Performance? How is it different?

Serenna Starr:
For me personally ... My strip show was the same as my burlesque show. What you saw at the Belmont Burlesque Halloween Show was actually one of my past feature shows... and costumes.

For me, there's nothing different. I know that's not how a majority of performers feel tho.

In my mind ... The difference between "stripper" and "burlesque performer" is the intent, and the frequent spreading of the legs.

A lot of Strippers kind of have those dead eyes and hate being on stage.

Performers, me in particular, hate the hustle and love to dance and entertain.

Travis:
I've noticed some gals who seem to love the hustle. Almost seem to thrive on it. Have you crossed the path of many like these?

Serenna Starr:
Oh sure! And a part of me always wanted to be a little more like them.

I just can't stand being told no. I mean, we are all in it for the moolah, right? I admired the girls who could separate out a bit, make $1000+ a night and not sweat the rejection and the handful of people who were jerks.

Travis:
What were the situations that caused you to say ... I can no longer be a dancer full time?

Serenna Starr:
I honestly caved under pressure to "grow up" and "establish my career before it's too late" etc.

I also had met what I believed at the time to be the love of my life, bought a house, and was really enjoying being at home. I started taking fewer bookings, then got offered less bookings too because I was calling my agents less.

There were sooooo many girls on the circuit at the time, and soooo many clubs not booking like they used to. So, all of us were fighting for the same jobs, new girls would get booked for cheaper.

I just didn't have the fight in me anymore. I worked a couple of local clubs, but the clientele just didn't buy into the kind of dancing I was doing. Or they weren't spending, or appreciative, or nice even.

So I took to managing clubs for a while. Being on the other side of things was actually really nice for a while.

So, I can honestly say that I have worked in every aspect of a Gentleman's Club. I have worked the door, bartended, waitressed, been the janitor, managed. I have even bounced people out before. I didn't feel I could be an effective manager unless I was good at each position that I was managing.

Travis:
So ... If I were a promoter and I wanted to send you on a 3 month tour of several areas in the US and Canada.

What type of package would I need to offer?

Or would you simply say "No" unless it was a mass of diamonds on a plate?

Serenna Starr:
LOL!

The rate is generally dependent upon how many days and how many shows. A typical booking for me was a 4 day run that included 12 shows. Then I'd need a couple of days off to recover.

In order to give you an exact amount, I'd need to consult with a few girlfriends who are currently featured dancers. But I can tell you that it would be several hundred for the week. Plus you'd pay for the hotel and you'd provide me with reasonable travel expenses.

Travis:
If you watched your expenses ... What could you hope to pocket from that situation?

Serenna Starr:
Well, I would get to keep my tips and sell merchandise after the shows.

Depending upon the busy-ness of the club, sometimes that could bring in a few extra hundred an evening. Sometimes you just break even and come out with your paycheck intact.

Out of courtesy, I should be tipping your DJs, bar staff and floor staff. Then I have to pay a commission to the agent that got me the gig in the first place. I've been in a few places where I walked away with something like $4000 in a week, and others where I've come out of it close to empty handed.

There was the time when someone on staff stole my purse after the club had cashed my paycheck. That left me mad at humanity, since it was an inside job, and I was nearly stranded about 500 miles from home on Christmas Eve.

Travis:
Bummer!

OK ... For an upcoming Saturday Evening ... You have 2 opportunities to attend an elegant cocktail party.

The first party involves you being invited because you are known as a Costumer and Performer. Numerous people will want to talk to you and get to know you better.

The second event involves you essentially being a businessman's arm candy for the evening. Your reason for being there would be to help him look good. And you'll have the opportunity to meet some very interesting people who are not in the entertainment industry.

Being able to choose only one invitation ... What would you consider to be the advantages and disadvantages of each opportunity?

Serenna Starr:
My tendency would be to go to the first.

I prefer people to get to know me. And although I have played the arm candy role in the past (and had fun with it) I am in a place in my life where I really love what I do, and love having opportunities to talk about it.

There is always that certain curiosity about opportunity #2. Which celebrity or other person of note might I miss out on seeing. But given the circumstances of our meeting, those people would likely only see me as cotton candy anyways.

And I hate being treated like fluff!

Travis:
And for the party that you've chosen ... How are you going to be done up, in order to be really eye catching?

Serenna Starr:
In typical fashion...Perfect hair, perfect makeup, perfect presentation, well put together.

I've been very into the dresses they sell at the Betty Page store, and what they do for my figure. My wardrobe is nearly full of them. A cleavagey wiggle dress and a pair of sassy heels that would go for the win!

Travis:
Where would the hem be in relation to the knees?

Serenna Starr:
Just at or a tiny bit below. Like the dresses I had on at the last Stripperfest.

Travis:
Bare leg? Hose? Full Fashion stockings?

Serenna Starr:
Nearly always a bare leg.

I loooove back seam thigh high stockings with a Cuban heel, but a lot of my shoes don't jive with the Cuban.

And the stocking and garter belt combo doesn't always mix well with figure hugging outfits.

Travis:
So ... Your Gentleman would have to buy you shoes for the evening? (wink)

Serenna Starr:
Meeeow!

Travis:
You and the wife and I need to go shopping sometime

Serenna Starr:
LOL!

I've seen how your wife dresses. Are you sure your wallet is ready for the two of us?

Travis:
Since the answer to that question is probably "No", I think I'll just hug you good bye and declare this interview completed.

Serenna Starr:
Smart man (wink).

~~~~~~~~~~

Any photo holding a notation of Striptaculous has been supplied by Curtis Isom. All other pictures were supplied by Serenna Star. All rights belong to the individuals listed or to other photographers who have taken the photos.

Sincere thanks to Serenna and to Curtis.

Showbiz Interview: Moses Carroll

( Originally published on Blogger 11-11-2013 )

Moses Carroll is a gentleman, an entrepreneur, and a delightfully crazy person to spend an evening with. On the afternoon of October 29, I had the opportunity to conduct an in depth discussion with the fellow.

Travis:
You're actively involved with 2 organizations ... MC Healthcare and Pole Dance America ... How did each situation evolve?

Moses Carroll:
MC Healthcare is a non-profit organization that I created in 2005 in an effort to promote healthy and more active lifestyles. When I began working in the fitness industry and saw the happiness that clients received from losing weight, playing sports or lowering their blood pressure I realized I wanted to be that bridge to education and motivation. Pole Dance America is a spin off of MCH. The first of 3 programs we are using to educate people on the benefits of living an active lifestyles.

Travis:
So ... MC Healthcare is intended to be about more than just Pole Dancing?

Moses Carroll:
Yes, MCH's focus is on education and demonstration which leads to motivation and a desire to be successful. Plus it allows us to give a platform for those that want to show and be examples of what happens when you dedicate yourself to reaching a goal.

Travis:
And does all this keep you on the road quite a bit?

Moses Carroll:
Yes, 6 to 8 months per year that I'm on the road.

The PDA Prelims are conducted like a season - just like football This allows us to promote across the country and get people excited about Pole Fitness

Travis:
My wife (and a close friend of ours) have told me that they'd consider you to be a "Nice Catch".

Are you currently available? Or are you spoken for?

Moses Carroll:
I'm single.

The pole competitions have pretty much placed a halt to my dating life. Mainly because of the traveling and being around half naked women. What I've been told is "an issue”

I must admit it is hard cause all of them are nice, beautiful and talented. But I respect the positions we are ALL in and would hate to have a reputation as the dude that's having relations with a contestant... I love PDA & MCH to much to ruin it.

Most of the girls are really great and very sincere but there's always the concern that one might take my kindness for emotional comfort and intimacy.

Travis:
Not asking you to name any names ... But have there been any club girls who have seemed determined to sink their hooks into you?

Moses Carroll:
You know, Ive been lucky not to have been in that situation.

I will say I'm often oblivious when women hit on me cause I'm not sure if they are really serious or testing the waters to see how far I they can take me.

Travis:
Okay ... For all the adoring ladies who aren't in the industry ... And how tall are you?

Moses Carroll:
I'm a nice 6'1 of caramel goodness - LOL

Travis:
(Snickering)
And what qualities would cause you to be attracted to a woman?

Moses Carroll:
That a good question... So many qualities but in life you can only receive a few. So I will ask for - Goal setter and achiever, team player, trustworthy, affectionate and most important versatile.

Travis:
Any habits or attitudes that are serious turn offs?

Moses Carroll:
Well, hmmmmm - sorry for taking so long... I had to think about that cause dealing with women is like playing chess. Cause when you think you making the right moves you might not be.

Attitudes will always be there. So understanding & better communication has to play a major role.

Habits – I take the good with the bad if she is the one I choose to be with. Now I will say I don't like complainers, bad memories, constant gossipers and women that don't know themselves. It takes a strong woman to deal with a man like me cause I'm a handful and you have to have a backbone.

Travis:
You've met a girl that you really want to get to know better and you're trying to treat her to a really neat first date. What kinds of things would you consider?

Moses Carroll:
Hmmmm ... I enjoy cooking, so I would either invite her out to eat somewhere that I can prepare the food or invite her to my loft with the city skyline view.

Do a few things that will cater to her personality and will introduce her to my likes. And I do pay attention to the details of a woman so I will do things to please her – mentally & emotionally.

Travis:
Other than on the lips ... What is your favorite "respectable spot" for kissing a girl? (I love my wife's legs and shoulders).

Moses Carroll:
The entire Back, Legs and Hips

Travis:
Some guys want a girl to have a totally natural look. A few really get into the ones who have obviously had a lot of cosmetic surgery or who really go intense on the make up or hair dye or tattoos. What's your take on this?

Moses Carroll:
Natural beauty -- to me -- is wonderful. Tattoos, breast and glut implants are fine; if they are used to enhance. But if it takes over the original art of the human body - then its not the real person's natural beauty. It doesn't change the person - but it hides what I would like to be as my soul mate. But don't get me wrong – I will still love the woman.. Every way possible...

Travis:
Where are you originally from?

Moses Carroll:
Born in Memphis, TN. Atlanta has been my home for 14 years.

Travis:
How did you wind up in Atlanta?

Moses Carroll:
Was ready for a change, woke up on morning and said - I'm moving. Packed my bags and relocated,

Travis:
I was raised in something fairly close to the Traditional Southern Christian Family. And even though I'm involved in several forms of "Adult Entertainment" ... I still have certain standards that I hold to and that I expect to see from people that I think of as friends.

How did your upbringing affect your adult life?

Moses Carroll:
Ohhhh boy... I'm very outspoken. I don't like people that play both side of the fence.

Travis:
Well ... I try not to give attitude. But I'll do something like bow my head and pray before a meal (while in a restaurant) ... And certain people will act like "But I saw you in an adult club last night".

And I will simply tell them that I believe in God and I try to live a good and respectful life but I'm not a Prude.

Moses Carroll:
Thats great... cause I do the same... its the "Over The Top People" that get under my skin. We are all here to enjoy life but they condemn people for doing in public what they do in private. That's ridicules.

I know my mistakes and errors but I'm not going to bring others down to make myself seem perfect. Live and let live..

You and I think somewhat alike - if they don't like it or understand.. that's not our fault...

Travis:
Thank you.

How many competitions have you judged?

Moses Carroll:
8

Travis:
And what qualities are you looking for when you judge?

Moses Carroll:
Skills / Creativity / Stage Presence

Travis:
Anything else you'd like to tell the readers?

Moses Carroll:
Find happiness in the things you love and never let life issues distract you. Enjoy every moment – cause its fun!!!

Travis:
Sounds like a good comment to end on. Thank you very much.

Moses Carroll:
You're welcome.

Thanks you for chatting with me.

Love Peace and VO5!!!

Burlesque Review: The Villainous Plan 9 Affair

( Originally published on Blogger 11-07-2013 )

TO ---

Director Forbush

FROM ---

Agent D - 1071CCN

SUBJECT ---

Recent Events In Chicago

Officially ... The building at 3914 North Clark Street is known as the Public House Theatre.

But if someone carefully does their research ... They might just stumble upon the truth. That this location actually serves as the meeting place for a Secret Society of True Believers. On the last Sunday of each Month, this seemingly nondescript establishment is the House of Worship for Chicagoland's Geek Orthodox.

The ceremonies they practice are steeped in Mystery and are almost as old as time itself. Throughout the ages, these activities have been known by different names in different societies. But by comparing at least a dozen different sources ... And drawing upon the various linguistic qualities of each ... I've been able to come up with what I believe is the most accurate North American English Translation.

While stationed here in the Great Lakes Sector ... I'd been informed that this society was in search of an Independent Observer and Translator. Someone who was fluent in both Geek and English ... And who could understand these strange and unusual rituals and explain them to the average Man and Woman on the street.

Using the alias of Travis Clemmons ... I immediately submitted my resume and was quickly contacted by Stella Cheeks, the High Priestess of Plan 9. She explained that the theme of their Late October Event would be the Nature of the Villain as He and She have existed in both History and Fiction.

Maybe it was the way Stella batted those long dark eyelashes as she smiled at me. Maybe it was those legs and hips and the way she knew how to saunter as she made her way through a room. Whatever it was ... I knew I needed to learn more about this woman and her band of followers. I figured some additional up close observation was the least I could do when National Security might possibly be at stake.

On the evening of Sunday, October 27 - 2013 ... I arrived at the Public House in my official identity of Clemmons. On my arm was a lovely escort named Karen. The two of us had made a habit of trading favors during the past few years.

Once inside the Theatre ... I found a convenient spot, readied my camera and began my surveillance. Whatever this group might be up to, I wanted to make sure I had the complete scoop on everything.

Hot Tawdry - Bella Canto - Marie Curiosity - Stella Cheeks

Heckler interrupted the characters of Kitana, Doctor Horrible, Michelle Bachman & Darth Vader as they were performing to Thriller.

My first actual clue that something nefarious might be in the making was when Stella (while dressed as a Darth Vader like Barbie Doll) used some sort of psychic mind control to silence a Heckler who'd obviously started drinking at least three days before the show began. If she and her followers had this type of insidious power, could any organization succeed in stopping them from achieving world domination? And as gorgeous as these women looked, would any man really want to try?

Within the first thirty minutes ... It became quite obvious that the members of this society were quite skilled in the practice of Striptotharsus.

The ritualistic removal of ornamental clothing

in a teasing manner which provides onlookers

with a deep sense of euphoria and the overwhelming

sensation of having been emotional cleansed.

Right This Way Robbie as Ice King (She's So Cold / Rolling Stones)

My initial cause for concern was their ability to subtly interweave secret coded messages into their routines while disguising this activity as humor. During the course of the evening ... There were numerous instances where the behavior of the individuals on stage would cause those in the audience to snicker, chuckle, cheer, guffaw and even break into outrageous laughter.

Hot Tawdry as a forlorn Doctor Frankenstein (Fix It / Cold Play)

What most aroused my interest ... As the evening went on ... Was the way in which these insidious geniuses combined elements of Conflict, Drama and Horror with Sensuality, Titillation and Erotica. Clearly this is part of some larger plot to work towards the complete unraveling of the nations morals and standards.

Marie Curieosity as Countess Bathory (Honest Mistake / Bravery)

Comedian: Adam McAleavey

Having collated all the data that I managed to gather that evening ... And having run this information through at least seven different Translating or Decrypting systems ... It is obvious that there was a single overriding message woven into that evening's activities.

David Hasselhoff Is On To Us

I have already contacted Agent Hoff and informed him that his cover has been compromised. But frankly ... I'll never understand how he managed to convince people he was an entertainer all these years.

Aly Oops & Stella Cheeks as the Doctor & the Master (Drumming Song / Florence and the Machine)

Bella & Ellie (Bloody Mary / GaGa)

In the meantime ... I am concerned about the fact that membership rolls of this society seem to be steadily increasing. In order to make sure that their activities are properly observed and cataloged, I feel that it is my solemn duty to attend even more of these rituals.

Somebody has to do this job. It might as well be me.

Sincerely,

D - 1071CCN

Special Agent of S.H.E.E.S.H.

~~~~~~~~~~

My sincere apologies to any Plan 9 Performer that I have not mentioned in this review. There was simply too much good material and I had to go for what I considered to be the Best of a Great Bunch.

Unless a photo is noted as "Travis Clemmons" ... It is the property of the group or person being represented and is used here only for the purpose of writing this review.

Burlesque Review: Belmont Halloween Show

( Originally published on Blogger 110-04-2013 )

My lovely wife and I consider Serenna Star to be a good casual friend. While we don't know the lady incredibly well ... We have been seriously impressed by her on each occasion when her path has crossed ours.

On the evening of October 26 - 2013 ... The two of us made sure to be in the audience for Serenna's performance at the Belmont Burlesque Halloween Show. We had absolutely no idea of what she'd be performing. We simply knew that if this Lovely Evil Redhead was involved the show was guaranteed to be good.

To our pleasant surprise, everything about the evening quickly leapt above the position of "good" and kept soaring upwards from there.

For starters ... The Wit Theater is a marvelous venue for this type of presentation. Anyone hoping to put on a successful Burlesque Performance needs a well designed setting that brings a sense of intimacy to the event. The Wit does this perfectly, there simply isn't a bad seat in the house.

As the first dance performance of the evening ... Diva LaVida set the bar incredibly high. Her interpretation of "Chinese Ghost Story" was both chilling and erotic. Proof positive that what unsettles us can also bring a sense or erotic euphoria.

After Diva LaVida had almost made us feel like every bit of oxygen had been sucked from the room ... The Amazing Tomas walked onto the stage and brought it right back in.

I do have to say that I've not exactly been the biggest fan of Tomas. During the past few years, I've attended several shows where he was the "Featured Magician" and his style had generally left me feeling like things were just a bit flat. On this particular evening, the man's humor and slight of hand were perfectly on target. I wish him the best on building his act even better as time goes on.

A couple of acts later ... We finally had the opportunity to enjoy the work of Serenna Starr. And I have to say that her performance was most certainly worth the wait. A tormented and writhing interpretation of "They're Coming To Take Me Away" that managed to impact on a great many emotional buttons.

Touching -- Humorous -- Sad -- Erotic -- Psychotic -- Sublime

And just when we thought things could not get any delightfully crazier ... Helena Handbasket sauntered onto the stage and showed us all an Angel of Death that many of the audience members would gladly have stood in line for the privilege of kissing. The woman put a spin on "Down In Hadestown" which was nothing less than Deliciously Wicked!

All of these elements (and a good many more, too numerous to mention) were expertly held together by the sly antics of Ms Pixie. The woman was truly sublime as a voluptuous Princess of Darkness with an unholy appreciation of Sweet Young Things.

The mark of a really good Variety Show is that it is able to strike a theme and then find ways to provide a numerous amount of intriguing variations and distortions. This show accomplished that task every step of the way.

My wife and I went to see a pretty girl dance. We wound up being treated to an uproarious feast of comedy, satire and exotic teasing.

I love it when I receive more than I'd bargained for!

~~~~~

And before I forget ... I want to hand a special shout out to Curtis Isom of Striptaculous.Com.

On Saturday evening, I was having camera problems (mostly caused by a loose nut behind the machine). After learning that I was in need of assistance, Curtis was quite helpful and provided many of the pictures that are shown in this article.

Halloween Entertainment Heaven

( Originally published on Blogger 10-30-2013 )

This past weekend was most certainly an instance where lightning was able to strike twice in the same place. The location was the Northern side of Chicago. The lightning bolts were two marvelous Burlesque presentations.

~~~~~

Belmont Burlesque on Saturday evening.

~~~~~

Plan 9 Burlesque on Sunday evening.

Two delightful Halloween celebrations. Each with its own unique style. Both of them incredibly satisfying.

In just a few days ... After I've had the opportunity to sort through a mass of pictures and other information ... I'll be back with a detailed review of each of the shows. In the meantime, please allow me to focus on the three main reasons why each show was so incredibly entertaining.

- 1 -

The members of each performance troupe (dancers, comedians, magicians, musicians and other talent) are appearing on stage because they take pleasure in providing quality entertainment. Whatever fame or money might come along is simply a bit more icing on the cake.

- 2 -

Each troupe clearly understands its audience.

Belmont is solidly rooted in the traditional "Tease & Please" rendition of a Risque Variety Show.

Plan 9 is all about merging the elements of Science Fiction, Fantasy and Horror with patterns of erotic sensuality and a healthy dose of absurd humor.

- 3 -

Neither troupe makes the mistake of confusing snarky political commentary with cutting edge entertainment. While venues like Burlesque can be a fine breeding ground for razor sharp social humor ... I've had to endure way too many instances where the person in front of the microphone is operating under the assumption that simply declaring "Obama is a fucking crook" or "Boehner needs to get his head out of his ass" somehow qualifies as political satire.

And there are a handful of Burlesque

and Cabaret shows that I will never again

set foot in for exactly that reason

The long and short of it is that both Belmont Burlesque and Plan 9 Burlesque clearly realize that they exist to provide entertainment. And the the two troupes accomplish this task in an incredibly delightful fashion.

If you would like to know more about these two entertainment troupes ... Please click on the links that are shown below.

The pictures shown in this article are the property of each entertainment troupe that is being referred to or to the photographer / artist responsible for the picture. They are used only for the purpose of providing a suitable review of each organization.

Showgirl Interview: Phoenix Phires

( Originally published on Blogger 10-20-2013 )

On the weekend of September 28 & 29, I had the pleasure of attending Stripperfest 12 and meeting several very attractive and talented performers. Among them was the lovely Dancer and Costume Designer Phoenix Phires, who won the competition for Princess of the Stage.

After reading my article on the Princess portion of the competition, Phoenix agreed to have an in depth chat session with me. So we set aside an afternoon when we'd both be available and then we spent a couple of hours typing till our fingers were sore.

Travis:
Where did the name Phoenix Phires come from?

Phoenix Phires:
I'm a big comic book fan. So I wanted a name to display that side of me.

After a few different ideas I finally settled on Phoenix as in Jean Gray from the x-men. Phires came later. Fire was the concept but I thought the ph put a nice touch on it as comic book characters often have names that way. IE. Peter Parker

Travis:
Delightful idea for a name!

Let's move on to the basic "Girl Watcher" questions.

How tall are you?

Phoenix Phires:
Haha.

5'3" out of heels.

Travis:
Measurements?

Phoenix Phires:
32 DD - 26 - 36

Travis:
Eye Color?

Phoenix Phires:
Brown

Travis:
Is the eye catching red hair an everyday thing?

Or do you look a bit more subdued at the mall or the grocery store?

Phoenix Phires:
The Intense Hair is definitely an everyday thing. I get strange looks everywhere I go. Always starting a riot. Turns out even in jeans, a t-shirt and sun glasses I still don't blend well.

Travis:
If I asked you to be ready for a casual dinner (pizza / burgers / wings / or whatever) and a movie. What style should I expect to see when you open your front door and say hello?

Phoenix Phires:
Hot!

(he he)

Actually, probably a little less wild than my stage personality. I like simple and elegant. Id probably wear a little black dress and some pearls.

Travis:
And if it was a dress up date ... Fancy dinner and then a cabaret show?

Phoenix Phires:
Still elegant. Longer dress. Lots of shiny to it. You know girls love shiny things.

Travis:
Speaking of shiny things ... If a gentleman were to surprise you with a gift of a delightfully wicked pair of high heels ... How high should they be?

And what color?

Phoenix Phires:
I like all heights. I wear lower heels mostly (like 4 inch) but I love higher heels especially if they are boot style heels. Any color except pink!

And I'm a size 7 btw.

Travis:
Okay ... So boots ... Any color but pink.

And would that 4" include a platform? Or would you start with a 4" ankle twist and then allow a platform to jack the total height up to something like 5.5 or 6?

Phoenix Phires:
4 inch - very small platform. Red bottom shoes are one of my favorites too.

Just saying.

Travis:
I love a girl who knows how to lay her cards on the table (wink).

So ... I'm 5'11". To come close to looking me in the eyes, you'd need a 6 to 8 inch pair of Bitch Queen Spikes.

Could you do that for an evening?

Phoenix Phires:
I've worn 8" heels.

Travis:
And I'd love to see you in them sometime.

Should pantyhose be outlawed as a form of cruel and unusual punishment? Or do you feel they have their place in the fashion world?

Phoenix Phires:
I feel that pantyhose are appropriate at the right times. Nice blazer and skirt. That sort of outfit.

Travis:
And how are you when it comes to stockings and garter belts? Or thigh Highs?

Phoenix Phires:
I love them! But never really have much of a reason to wear them!

Travis:
Never been one to use them to spice up a date a bit?

Phoenix Phires:
Nah. If I wanna do that, I just tell him I'm not wearing panties

Travis:
(snickering)

And are you one of the girls who really likes to be corseted from time to time?

Phoenix Phires:
Do I like wearing corsets?

(lol)

Did you check out my pictures from Stripperfest

Travis:
I saw you looking all tight waisted. I just wasn't sure if that was the real you or the stage persona.

On to the professional questions.

When did the idea of Professional Stage Performing pop into your brain?

Phoenix Phires:
I started as a Belly Dancer with a local troupe in the Lafayette area. I LOVED performing, dancing, just being on the stage.

I was also a waitress and going to school at the time. I'd had enough of the restaurant I was in and moved on to cocktail waitressing at Michaels Mens Club. A manager at that club figured that if I could belly dance I should try being a dancer.

My first night was pretty rough. Dancing in those 8 inch heels we were talking about, trying out the pole, lots of new things. After a couple of weeks I got pretty good at what I was doing and turned in my waitressing tray for some stilettos.

6 months into dancing, Christina Aguchi walked through our doors at Michaels and blew the roof off the place with her Ninja show. I had never seen anything like it but with as much energy as I put into being on stage when I was at work, I knew that THIS was what I wanted to do.

Over the next several months I started asking her for advice and help. I also took classes and did everything I could to constantly improve. Finally, with Christina's guidance, I entered my first competition in the Industry (Miss Nude Wisconsin) in which I placed second.

And well, you know where it goes from there.

Travis:
Had you done any sort of dancing as a child?

Phoenix Phires:
Not at all. I had never dreamed I would be a dancer but I was always a crafty child.

I have had a paintbrush in my hand since before I could walk. I was always making things. Clothes for dolls, props, toys, anything and everything. I studied art through school and thats where my first draw into Belly dance got started.

I had a friend who was interested in learning to sew. I exchanged sewing lessons for dance lessons with her and started making my own costumes as well on the side. I love the production elements of a show just as much as I love actually dancing and putting on the show.

Travis:
At Stripperfest, you competed in (and won) the category Princess of the Stage. Was this your first time in full blown competitive stage performing?

Phoenix Phires:
I've participated in a few competitions since April. Could you be a bit more specific on what you mean by full blown?

Travis:
Stage is more theatrical. Pole is more about just the music and dance moves.
So I was asking if this was your first "Stage" competition.

Phoenix Phires:
Oh no. I've competed in Miss Nude Wisconsin and I competed in Miss Nude Rising Star at Nudes a Popping. I placed second in both.

I also competed in my first Skindustry competition months ago -The Grand Prix of Exotic Dance at On The Border. Finally building up to Stripperfest at On The Border.

Travis:
In your opinion ... How are the demands of Stage performing different from those of Pole Dancing?

Phoenix Phires:
I find pole is a very athletic competition whereas stage is more a mixture of different attributes including dance ability, props, and costumes, but overall its a matter of how well you can entertain.

Depending on what competition you enter, most Clubs or Agencies are more than happy to give you all of their judging criteria upfront for anyone with questions. That takes a lot of the guess work out of it.

Travis:
A lot of people who act or dance or sing, actually have an introverted side. That need to leave the job and get away from people for a few hours here and there. Are you someone who needs your alone time?

Phoenix Phires:
I think everyone needs to have their own sort of get away. If not you will go crazy. You cant let yourself be sucked into your work 24/7. Its not healthy. For me, its the 3 days I get off Sun - Tues to spend with my family at home.

Travis:
Some of the Dancers will say that they enjoy showing as much skin as possible on a regular basis. Others seem to enjoy the bathing suit look (or partial nudity) while in the club or on stage ... But then they have this need to be fairly modest during the rest of their time.

Where do you fit in?

Phoenix Phires:
To each their own. But I would like to think my style is more in a burlesque fashion. The tease of nudity is there without giving it all away. Leaving them with wanting more.

Travis:
I love that attitude

The "Friendly Flirting" that takes place at Performance Clubs ... Some Women say it is very easy for them. Others have said that getting used to doing it is almost like having to learn a second language.

What has been your experience on the teasing and flirting that is expected to go on between the Dancers and the Patrons?

Phoenix Phires:
I'd say it came pretty naturally for me. Apparently, I flirt with everyone and didn't realize it for a long time. Or maybe my friendly attitude is mistaken for flirting.

Either way I just act as myself when I'm at work and things seem to be going well. I am a people person. Meeting new people all the time, socializing and networking is my thing.

Travis:
My lovely wife says that if I didn't flirt ... She'd call the Pentagon and tell them I'd been replaced by a Space Alien.

Phoenix Phires:
(giggle)

Travis:
A significant percentage of Dancers / Actors / Singers are very into cosmetic surgery. Others want to play by the rule of K.I.N.D. (Keep It Natural Dammit).

Do you have a particular opinion on this?

Phoenix Phires:
Once again, to each their own. I don't plan on having any type of surgeries, I am very content with my body just the way it is. But I have nothing against anyone who wants to alter their own body. If a dancer wants breast implants, who am I to knock her for changing her body when I change my hair color on a regular basis.

Travis:
When I was younger, my parents were split on me wanting to write, act and model. Mom was all for it. Dad (being old school conservative religious) kept accusing me of wanting to hang around with a bunch of "High Class Whores".

How did things go between you and your family?

Phoenix Phires:
Well, mom was 100 percent okay with it. Especially after she saw my bank account.

Even her parents were okay with it! (Grandmother: "I want to come dance with you! I can shake my butt too!!")

Travis:
(snickering)

Phoenix Phires:
My dad, on the other hand, we tiptoed around. He was very against Belly Dance in the first place so we were worried about how he would react. It wasn't until later when he found some pictures of me that the truth came out. He was pretty calm about it. I think he disapproves but he respects me enough not to say anything about it. He knows I'm an adult and he can't tell me what to do with my life.

Travis:
What advice would you give to a young woman who was asking about trying something like Pole Dancing or Stripping as a profession?

Phoenix Phires:
It would depend on what she was looking to do. Pole Dancing as a profession is very different from stripping, just as Stripping as a profession is very different from Featuring.

You can be a stripper without having to know pole tricks and visa versa

Travis:
Could you give us a brief run down on each?

Phoenix Phires:
Sure.

I'm not much of a Pole Girl but I will start there. Most I can tell you for pole is that it takes a lot of practice and patience. I'm still learning myself and slowly getting better. Some days I'll work on a new trick for hours and never get it right. Sometimes I'll wake up the next day, jump on the pole and get it in the first try. Sometimes not so much.

It's a constant struggle. Some days your body just isn't up for what you are trying to put it through. But I definitely believe that the pole is a sport on its own. It is a lot of work and it a does great deal to keep you in shape.

In my opinion, stripping is all about how you carry yourself. As a house dancer or stripper, you don't have to be the best on the pole, you don't even have to be the best dancer.

If you walk into the club or onto the stage with your head up and you act like you know what you're doing, act confident, and most importantly SMILE, your job is pretty much done. Be confident but don't be cocky.

If you truly love being on stage, putting together shows, and dancing and you are interested in being a Feature Performer -- Prepare for a lot of hard work. A lot of investment (time and money... blood, sweat, and tears), and a lot of time away from home.

I LOVE my job. I love performing, traveling, everything. But it did not come easy. And I'm not even all the way there yet. I have put a lot of work into what I do, and I have mastered the Princess of the Stage at Stripperfest 12. But I know a lot more work will have to be put forth if I'm going to master the Queen of the Stage competition next year.

And there's even more work involved to make it higher than that. It's a matter of constantly training, constantly working. The A TEAM does not rest. And if you want to be in their league, neither should you.

Travis:
Anything else you'd like to tell the readers? Any points I might have missed that you'd like to touch on?

Phoenix Phires:
You can follow me on Facebook / Twitter / Instagram.
Always search for Phoenix Phires.

And I also have a brand new website at the strip mall. (PhoenixPhires.com) You can book me through Frank or Dave with A-List or Continental Agency.

Travis:
Thank you very much for your time.

Phoenix Phires:
You're very welcome. And thank you for helping me promote myself.

Travis:
It has been a pleasure.

But now it is time to hug you goodbye.

( All Pole Dance Pictures were taken by Tamie Yost with a Nikon D3200. All other pictures were supplied by Phoenix Phires (as photographed by Mark Delaney and Josh Stringer).

Stripperfest: Queen Of The Pole

( Originally published on Blogger 10-11-2013 )

The most grueling competition at Stripperfest 12 was undoubtedly Queen of the Pole. Two full blown qualification rounds on Saturday Evening, followed by the top three dancers being asked to return for a final round on Sunday.

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

One of the main problems with trying to put together a competitive performance in this category is that the Dancer has to find the proper balance between Pole Moves, Stage Moves and Audience Enticement. The Pole is your dance partner. It has to be the main focus of your attention. At the same time, you occasionally have to break away and make a show of what else you can do.

Strut your stuff.

Flirt with the audience.

Let them know you're working hard for their pleasure and you sincerely appreciate their attention.

Then saunter right back to the pole and show the crowd that you have what it takes to make a twelve foot tall piece of stainless steel beg for mercy.

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

Competing in both Queen of the Pole and Queen of the Stage, Vayda Kiss proved that she has the ability to work a situation for all it's worth. Unfortunately, it's difficult to be the absolute best in two different disciplines.

(Travis Clemmons - Nikon D3200 without flash)

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

(Travis Clemmons - Nikon D3200 without flash)

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

Vayda Kiss: Queen of the Pole - Stripperfest 12

(Tamie Yost - Canon Rebel DXT with flash)

Stripperfest: Princess Of The Stage

( Originally published on Blogger 10-09-2013 )

I was very happy to see that On The Border had placed a new category into this year's competition.

Princess of the Stage

The reason being that Stage Performing is a matter of combining at least two distinctly different styles. Pole Dancing and Burlesque.

The fact that a Dancer is good at one style of performing, doesn't automatically make her good at the other. Practice is needed. And the best way to practice ... To hone your skills and build your self confidence ... Is to perform in front of an audience in an actual Competition.

But it can be difficult to coax new talent into showing up for Stage Competitions when 3 or 4 seasoned veterans have already made it close to impossible for one of the new kids to place much higher than 4th or 5th position. Have a category like Princess of the Stage offers the opportunity to get your feet wet and see if you want to try for something more the next time around.

At Stripperfest 12, Phoenix Phires showed up to compete in both the Queen of the Pole and Princess of the Stage categories. While her pole performance was quite good, it was her stage dancing and comedic skills that really shone through during the course of the weekend.

Now that she has been named Princess of the Stage, I'm looking forward to seeing her kick it up a notch and compete for Queen of the Stage. I'm quit certain she has the performance talent for it.